I am looking at doing this fight tonight. I have a Pally/Lock/Priest and 2xMages.
The first fight seems like it could actually be easier than you are making it. Just do it like most people do in PuGs - run him into the back hallway all the way to the wall (have your toons set on follow). Drop follow as you get close to the end of the hallway, and then turn him away from your group. He will fear you... all of your toons will get feared... but they won't be able to run far because the hallway is narrow. Simply hit Follow/Break follow fast (to get them facing the right way) and continue DPS. This usually leaves the healer close enough to get a couple heals off even without changing their facing.
For the Inciter fight ... I am not looking forward to it :P
A couple of times I went in there with some friends that were "helping out" ... full epics 1.2k spell damage ... all that. OMG was that fight impossible. We finally completed it by simply having 1 DPser (a mage), the tank and the healer. Everyone else went into the other room and stayed there. We ran to the back of the platform - and no one attacked until the Pally had him to the wall in that back room (because of his knockback). DPS was really slow ... and the fight took FOREVER... but we got through it. Wand DPS is a real winner on this fight. Going OOM is actually good for everyone but the healer and tank. Seriously. Blow all your CD's right in the opening as soon as the pally has threat.
Hope that helps, let me know what works... I'll be in your shoes shortly

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